Muse

Raspberry Jam + Soulfighter

Thu, 19 Jun 2008 04:10:32 GMT

Sorry for the hiatus!

Here is some random Soulfighter! 8D

It was the frustrated yell that startled everyone in that apartment one quiet Sunday morning. In the bathroom, the shower curtain was hastily pulled back and there was some stumbling before the doorknob rattled and YooChun appeared looking surprised and a bit irritated, in the crack of the door with a towel around his waist.

JunSu paused as he pulled on his pants, tripping on a pant leg in the process and fell back into his bed at the sudden loud noise. With some effort, he struggled and managed to put his legs through before hopping off the side of the bed and continued to hop until they were at his waist.

YunHo jolted from his nap in front of the television. When had he fallen asleep? He looked around in confusion trying to recall the last bits of his consciousness before he had fallen asleep and what had stirred him so abruptly out of it.

JaeJoong in the kitchen, wearing a black apron, sighed and reached over to grab the jar that ChangMin was struggling over. Wrapping a rubber band around the lid, he twisted it off easily but all that struggling that ChangMin had done had created a collection of Raspberry jam on the top of the lid. Jam flew across the table but not before spattering JaeJoong’s face and tips of his fingers.

“ChangMin-ah, what are you yelling about so early in the morning?” YunHo’s voice came from the den.

“Yah, you scared me half to death!” YooChun yelled from the bathroom.

“My pants almost killed me!” JunSu exclaimed from the bathroom.

Only silence was their response and feeling rather curious and worried, the three met up halfway in the direction of the kitchen. Stepping cautiously, they entered and stared at the opened jar of raspberry jam, its red sauce shining sweetly all over the kitchen table and the two men on top of it with sticky fingers.

ChangMin shifted, half sprawled on top of the other and JaeJoong blushed when they realized they had an audience.

“Ah, we finally got it opened.” JaeJoong laughed, nervously as he swiped a glob from his cheek and licked it off his thumb. “ChangMin got a little excited.”

“Min,” YunHo glared, warningly as he stepped over ready to pry the youngest member off by any means possible.

“Huh?” ChangMin blinked, innocently. “Umma always told me to never waste food.”

Mon, 18 Feb 2008 07:32:11 GMT

Title: Leader-sshi [2/2]
Rating: PG
Genre: Drama, Romance, Comedy
Challenge: jaeho_challenge 's 'Our fearless leader'
Summary: The members plan to break their leader's cool facade.

The silence was unbearable in the van as they traveled to the studio. YooChun had chosen to sit in the back next to JaeJoong, listening to music with his eyes closed as he rested his head against JaeJoong's shoulder. ChangMin and JunSu sat in the middle seat, exchanging nervous glances and unsure of the strange tension in the air.

YunHo had climbed in last, acknowledging them all with a slight nod of his head as he claimed the front seat. Presently he was talking to their manager in quiet tones, having a discussion about the schedule for the rest of the day.

Seeing YunHo was distracted, JunSu quickly turned around and poked YooChun.

Hard.

"Chunnie-ah, what did you do?" JunSu whispered with wide eyes. "We heard you and YunHo yelling at each other last night."

YooChun only stared at JunSu, motioned that he couldn't hear him with his headphones on and closed his eyes.

JunSu frowned in disappointment.

"JaeJoong-Hyung, do you know what happened?" ChangMin asked the other who was currently staring out the window.

"What are you guys doing?" JaeJoong asked with his voice subdued. "Was this part of the plan?"

"What plan?" ChangMin asked, confused. JaeJoong turned and stared at him. "Oh!"

In the front, their manager looked at them curiously through the rear view mirror and YunHo turned to glance at them.

"Didn't anyone tell you?" ChangMin whispered, quickly lowering his voice. "We called it off. JunSu, didn't tell you?"

"I was supposed to tell him?" JunSu gaped. "I thought you were!"

JaeJoong frowned and met YunHo's eyes up front. Their leader turned back around in his seat and refocused his gaze out the window.

"What are you four whispering about?" Their manager asked up front.

"Nothing Hyung!" JunSu chirped.

"Hmm…" Their manager raised an eyebrow but didn't say anything else.

[._.]

He heard her heels hard against the tiles of the brightly lit hallway before he saw her. They rounded the corner as JaeJoong pressed the button on the vending machine for a can of strawberry milk. They stopped, pretty feet in cute open-toed red heels, in front of him as he straightened after retrieving the can from the bottom.

"JaeJoong-sshi?" She asked with a pretty hand over her bosom as she sought to catch her breath.

"Yes, how can I help you?" JaeJoong asked, popping the tab of his milk and taking a sip. He was hoping the sweet taste would get rid of the bitterness in his mouth from YooChun's outburst last night and YunHo's indifference that morning.

"I'm Moon Hye Won from 'Beat!'." The woman introduced herself. "I was wondering if I could have a few quick words." As she spoke, a cameraman rounded the corner, and JaeJoong smiled politely.

"Of course, whenever you're ready." He replied.

"JaeJoong-sshi, we have followed Dong Bang Shin Ki's activities in Japan and your vocals are clearly heard throughout every song. Will your fans anticipate a solo album anytime soon?" Hye Won asked, cheerfully.

"I have not thought about going solo. It is a good goal for the future but for now, I am dedicated on being DBSK's YoungWoong JaeJoong." JaeJoong smiled.

"How do you feel about anti-fans criticizing your voice and spreading rumors on the subject of you becoming leader for DBSK?" Hye Won continued.

"What?" JaeJoong blinked.

"They are saying that you have manipulated the members and have demanded that YunHo should step down from leadership or you would leave the group." Hye Won explained.

"There is no such thing. YunHo is the leader and it will stay that way." JaeJoong said, firmly.

"If you have the chance, would you become leader?" She asked, curiously.

"No." JaeJoong frowned. "Ah wait. Hye Won-sshi, I want you to cut this part. I am feeling uncomfortable; can you ask me some other questions?"

"Certainly!" Hye Won beamed. "Because of your controlling nature, you are forbidding the other members from being in relationships. Is this true?"

JaeJoong laughed in amazement.

"Where are you getting these rumors from?" He asked. "No, it is just because we are too busy to be in a relationship."

"I'm sorry to hear that." Hye Won said, sympathetically. The cameraman stepped in closer and JaeJoong's grip unconsciously tightened on his can. She also stepped in closer. "JaeJoong-sshi, would you let your fans know one of your deepest, darkest secrets?" The can crumbled and strawberry milk sprayed into Hye Won's face and over her white blouse.

She shrieked, reeling back and JaeJoong apologized quickly, realizing what he had done. He quickly threw away the can.

"Ah, let me…" JaeJoong grabbed the towel draped over his shoulder and offered it to her.

She knocked his hand away, eyes lit in fury.

"I don't want your sweat drenched towel!" She screamed out angrily.

Curious onlookers around the studio had begun to stop and stare.

"This blouse was new!" She snapped.

"I'm so sorry. I will pay for the dry cleaning bills." JaeJoong told her. His hand reached out to touch her arm, comfortingly.

"Don't touch me!" Hye Won yelled. "How dare you! Who do you think you are?"

"I am so, so, sorry." JaeJoong apologized. "I don't know how to make it up to you, but-."

"Go jump off the top of the building if you are sorry!" Hye Won replied, her neat hair now a mess. At JaeJoong's silent shock she smirked. "You're not sorry at all."

JaeJoong stared at her for a long moment before taking a step forward. If it wasn't for the hand that suddenly grabbed his hand in a unrelenting grip, JaeJoong would have seriously gone up to the top of the building and jumped off.

"He apologized, ma'am." YunHo's smooth voice interrupted them as easily as water soothing fire. "It was an accident, please forgive him. We will replace your blouse as soon as possible."

"If everyone apologized for foolish mistakes then what will happen to the world?" Hye Won sneered. "Do you think murder can be solved with apologies? Or rape?"

"What are you talking about?" YunHo asked, staring at the woman as if she had grown another head. JaeJoong tugged on YunHo's hand and YunHo spared him a sharp glare before turning back to the woman. "It was just strawberry milk! It will come off easily with some bleach, soap, and water!"

"Are the rest of your members this impudent?" Hye Won scoffed. "What an interesting article to write, featuring DBSK's leader verbally assaulting a reporter."

"You wouldn't." YunHo stared.

"Would I?" Hye Won asked with an angelic smile.

"You're that person, aren't you?" YunHo realized. "The one that has bothering JaeJoongie!"

"What?" Hye Won stared in confusion.

JaeJoong remained silent, equally confused on what YunHo was talking about. He had never seen this woman before.

"Go ahead and write it then!" YunHo yelled suddenly.

JaeJoong struggled against YunHo's hold and YunHo swung his arm hard so that JaeJoong stumbled off balance. YunHo pulled JaeJoong closer to him. "If I wasn't here, this stupid guy would have seriously jumped off the top of the building! Do you understand this situation, you stupid naïve woman?"

JaeJoong stared at YunHo in surprise.

"Our JaeJoongie has a heart of gold and to prove that he is sorry, he will jump off the top of the building." YunHo continued, relentlessly. "How would you feel when you're spread across the tabloids as the one responsible for causing DBSK's lead vocalist's death?"

JunSu, YooChun, and ChangMin rounded the corner of the hallway sharply and skidded to a stop.

"Listen," YunHo's fingers flicked the badge around her neck to read her name. "Moon Hye Won-sshi, go ahead and write false things about me in your magazine. But don't you dare write anything about the other members or I will never forgive you."

"Hyung…" YooChun spoke up. "You're so cool."

JaeJoong and YunHo turned sharply to see YooChun beaming at them with a thumbs-up.

"Hyung, we finally see your 'fearless' leader side!" JunSu chirped, stressing 'fearless' in English.

"Hye Won-Noona!" ChangMin grinned. "Thank you for your hard work. No wonder you're a great actress."

Moon Hye Won curtsied dramatically in response to his compliment.

"Eh? What is this?" YunHo straightened and slowly released JaeJoong's hand.

YooChun grabbed the two of them and swung them around to stare into the additional cameras that had appeared behind them.

"This has been…" He began.

"U-Know Yunho…" JunSu laughed.

"And…YoungWoong JaeJoong's…" ChangMin added.

"Hidden Camera!"

Silence.

"Oh my god…" JaeJoong clasped his hands over his mouth with his wide eyes. He let out a yell of embarrassment. "So YooChun, yesterday…"

"Was an act!" YooChun told him.

"And today?" JaeJoong continued.

"Was to throw you off!" YooChun smirked.

"Park YooChun! You're dead!" JaeJoong yelled.

"Yah! Do you know how much stress I was in?" YunHo shouted at the younger members.

"Well, now we know…you're human after all." ChangMin said.

"Our 'fearless' leader-sshi can lose his cool in public!" JunSu smiled.

"Stop saying 'fearless' wrong." YooChun frowned. "Your English is horrible!"

"What's deer in English?" JunSu shot back. YooChun faltered for a moment and glared.

"You can quit singing and go into acting now." YunHo told them. "Ah, you guys are good. You guys do this again and I really won't forgive you! What will happen if JaeJoongie really jumped off? I will push all of you off after him!"

"Ah, leader-sshi! So scary!" The younger three chorused. "What about you?"

"Annoying!" YunHo laughed. His hand sought JaeJoong's and JaeJoong smiled gently at him as his fingertips caressed the bruising around JaeJoong's wrist.

"Of course if JaeJoong had jumped, I would have to catch him." YunHo smiled. "Because he is DBSK's fallen angel, sent to us from the heavens."

JaeJoong stared, cheeks reddening involuntarily, while the younger members snickered behind them.

With an icy smile, JaeJoong turned to the younger members who froze in fear.

"I'm not letting you three sleep easy tonight." He cooed.

!?!?

When they got home, JaeJoong watched a movie with YunHo on the couch while the three cleaned the house from top to bottom until it sparkled.

"Who's idea was this?" JunSu complained.

"Shut up." YooChun bit out.

"Both of you shut up." ChangMin sighed.

[end!]

Mon, 18 Feb 2008 02:24:46 GMT

Title: Leader-sshi [1/2]
Rating: PG
Genre: Drama, Romance, Comedy
Challenge: jaeho_challenge 's Our fearless leader
Summary: The members plan to break their leader's cool facade.

It started with the overly contagious enthusiasm of the members behind their leaders back. JunSu and YooChun were excited, ChangMin was doubtful, and JaeJoong was worried.

"Are you sure?" JaeJoong asked with a frown. ChangMin nodded in agreement next to his Hyung and his lips were mismatched as they set into a disapproving line.

"What if it backfires?" ChangMin asked.

"Aish…" YooChun sighed. "It's only a prank, don't you want to see our leader-sshi lose his cool?"

"Aren't you curious what he looks like when he's mad?" JunSu added in, excitedly. "JaeJoong-Hyung's first impression was so cold and it seemed like he wasn't going to bleed--."

"Must you always bring that up?" JaeJoong interrupted quickly in dismay.

"—But YunHo-Hyung has never ever lost his cool in front of others." JunSu finished as if JaeJoong hadn't interrupted him.

"I am curious. But I don't think YunHo would like this." JaeJoong protested.

"It'll be good for him." YooChun promised. He placed a hand on JaeJoong's shoulder and squeezed it affectionately.

"…Okay…" JaeJoong replied, still unsure.

[._.]

It was almost scary how everyone slid into their respective roles after that discussion. JaeJoong kept quiet, watching from the sidelines as a spectator rather than a participant.

ChangMin played his role perfectly, acting like his normal self.

YooChun would tease JunSu mercilessly until JunSu was either fuming, embarrassed, or close to tears.

And he, kept to himself as he stared out the window, arms wrapped around his body with artificial reassurance.

However, he failed to see the worried glances that YunHo had shot him all evening. He was distracted, even when he was talking to his superiors which usually he would diligently give all his attention.

"What's wrong?" Their manager asked in concern.

YunHo blinked and smiled at their Hyung. "Ah, maybe just a little tired. Sorry, I wasn't listening."

"Get some rest then, all of you worked hard. We'll just go over the schedule again, tomorrow." Their manager replied, patting his shoulder. "All of you get some rest!"

"Okay!" The three younger members chorused from their places around the apartment. After seeing their manager-Hyung out, YunHo immediately walked over to JaeJoong who hadn't moved from his spot near the windows.

He was oblivious to the knowing glances and the devious smirks that YooChun, JunSu, and ChangMin were exchanging behind his back.

He slid his hands under JaeJoong's arms and folded them over JaeJoong's stomach as he pulled the older member toward him.

"YunHo-ah?" JaeJoong questioned, his eyes meeting his in their reflection on the window.

The skyscape of Seoul twinkled in their reflection.

"Ah, your back looked lonely so I wanted to hug it." YunHo said, resting his chin on JaeJoong's shoulder.

YunHo felt JaeJoong's laugh before it bubbled out of his slightly parted lips.

A comfortable silence fell over them.

"What are you thinking about?" YunHo asked, quietly as if speaking too loud would chase away JaeJoong's thoughts.

"Nothing much," JaeJoong said after a moment, as if he was afraid to break their cocoon of comfort spun from warm embraces, soft words, and invisible silk. "I just felt like having some quiet time."

"I see." YunHo said. The hair near JaeJoong's ear tickled his cheek and YunHo stared, mesmerized by the honey-blond strands that used to be platinum blonde and at one time, jet black. "Get some rest, JaeJoongie." He tightened his hold on JaeJoong's slender waist for a brief moment before brushing his lips lightly against the same honey-blond stands he had been staring at and letting JaeJoong go.

JaeJoong didn't respond as YunHo walked away but his arms tightened again around his body, trying to fight the disappointing chill that slowly crept over the disappearing warmness that YunHo had gave him.

[._.]

"I hope Hyung is doing okay." ChangMin's worried words made YunHo stop in his tracks as he was heading to the kitchen.

"I hope that person doesn't do anything unnecessary." YooChun's voice was huskier than normal, often happening when he had conflicting emotions. "I heard Jae-Hyung was having some trouble…"

"I'm worried," JunSu murmured. "But JaeJoong-Hyung didn't want to discuss it…"

"What about Joongnie?" YunHo demanded, bursting into the room. The three of them stared at him with wide eyes, JunSu with his hand over his heart. They were all sitting on JunSu's bed in a triangle.

"Hyung!" JunSu squeaked out in surprise. "Are you hungry? We were going to make some ramen…"

"JunSu-ah, I heard everything. Who is this person bothering JaeJoong?" YunHo asked with seriousness in his tone that demanded attention.

"Leader-sshi," JunSu whispered softly under his breath to YooChun and ChangMin who nodded in agreement. Sometimes it was scary how easily YunHo can slip into a different role so easily. He should really become an actor.

"We aren't supposed to tell." ChangMin spoke up. "JaeJoong-Hyung didn't want anyone to know and we happened to walk in at the wrong time…"

"ChangMin!" YooChun snapped quickly, trying to stop him from saying more.

"YooChun, what do you know?" YunHo demanded.

"Nothing," YooChun replied, eyes glaring at the floor hard enough to burn a hole into it.

"YooChun…" YunHo said, warningly.

"Maybe you should tell him, Chunnie-ah." JunSu murmured, fingers stroking YooChun's arms soothingly.

"I don't know anything, okay!?" YooChun yelled, eyes misting over as he shot to his feet and rushed out the room.

"We shouldn't really press this matter. It's over and done with." ChangMin said, helplessly. YunHo blinked, seeing red for a moment before turning sharply and following YooChun out of the room.

He found YooChun with his arms wrapped around JaeJoong with his face hidden in JaeJoong's shirt at the window. JaeJoong looked confused as he rubbed soothing circles on YooChun's hunched back.

"YooChun-ah, what's wrong?" JaeJoong asked, curiously. "Did you get in a fight with JunSu again?"

YooChun only shook his head, staying stubbornly silent.

JaeJoong must have caught YunHo's thunderous expression as he walked into the living room because he shifted slightly, acting like a barrier between YooChun and YunHo.

YunHo's lips tightened into a thin line and his fingernails dug into the palms of his hands as he clenched them into fists.

"YunHo-ah, what's wrong?" JaeJoong asked, trying to soothe their irritated leader.

"You tell me." YunHo replied, stiffly. JaeJoong frowned, obviously confused on YunHo's irrational behavior. "You tell me what's wrong, JaeJoong!"

"Stop yelling at JaeJoong-Hyung!" YooChun burst out. "It's you who needs some self-reflecting! How can you understand everyone else when you remain cool all the time? You're not cool and you shouldn't be leader! Hyung should be leader!"

It was like a bomb, shattering promises, breaking dreams, and cutting the lines of friendship that connected each member to one another.

"Chun," JaeJoong said, nervously. "Take it back. Take back what you said."

YooChun gripped JaeJoong tighter, fingers turning white as he clutched onto JaeJoong's arms like it was his life support.

"YooChun-ah," JaeJoong tried again, his eyes narrowing and his lithe frame shaking from the thick tension on the air. "Apologize to our leader now."

"Sorry." YooChun mumbled, avoiding YunHo's hard stare and they all knew that YooChun didn't mean it.

"See YunHo, YooChun just got carried away." JaeJoong said with false cheer. It grated on YunHo's nerves and YunHo swallowed, his tongue feeling too thick in his mouth from being fed lies.

"I'm going to bed." YunHo said, calmly. "Go to bed early, YooChun. You're tired from today's schedule."

"Good night, YunHo-ah." JaeJoong said, softly. YunHo didn't respond as he walked away, shoulders tense. Looking down, he sighed. "YooChun, what have you done?"

YooChun's only response was to loosen his hold on JaeJoong's arms, guiltily knowing that there would be marks tomorrow.

[._.]

High Quality Ring Tones!

Tue, 13 Nov 2007 05:09:40 GMT

192 kbps and above because I am a HQ WHORE! <3

I'm trying out Sharebee.com

Mostly DBSK right now but I'm going to upload others later.

DBSK

Dangerous Mind intro cut [0.25]

Dangerous Mind JaeJoong cut [0:26]

Rising Sun ChangMin cut [0:43]

Miss You Chorus [0:17]

Lovin' U JaeJoong/Chorus [0:25]

[Oneshot] Because I want to...

Thu, 01 Nov 2007 04:39:07 GMT

Title: Because I want to
Author: Kisu
Genre: A mixture of angst and 'awww'
Pairing: Yunjae/OT5/JaeJoong-centric
Summary: Jaejoong's knee injury has created an inner turmoil within himself. When he felt the walls of his world crashing down, the other members was there to keep them up. One-shot.

He watched, consumed in regret and bitter hatred for himself in the shadows. The man who had been chosen to replace him danced in sync with the others, playing his role as part of the team. One half of his face was painted white, the other black, in an attempt to symbolize the co-existence of teamwork like the ying yang.

“Dong Bang Shin Ki can not be broken so easily.” Yunho had voiced in determination at one of their press interviews.

Jaejoong had believed him for a while but bickering arose among the members, verbal and at times, almost physical fights on disagreements of performance changes, and who was going to cover Jaejoong’s part. He had sat silently, eyes downcast, his throat working to voice the words that he didn’t want to say out loud.

Please don’t fight because of me.

His knee throbbed, a dull reminder that he had been standing too long.

They don’t need me. He thought to himself as he watched them perform flawlessly.

He was tired. A mental anguish that had consumed his mind was slowly consuming his heart.

As if sensing his thoughts, Yunho glanced over his shoulder in his direction before sliding into the final steps of the song. The audience automatically reacted in a thunderous applause. Fangirls sobbed in joy, their voices straining as they continued to scream shrilly.

The group gazed on, eyes blinded as the bright spotlight shone onto them before slowly dimming. Jaejoong smiled slightly, seeing the slight tremor in their tired limbs, their shoulders heaving as they collected their breath, and the sweat coating their face and neck.

They put their souls into their performances.

Slowly, he moved away toward backstage for the dark solitude it provided. In mid step, the energy suddenly rushed out of him and his knee buckled. Jaejoong clenched his teeth and closed his eyes, dreading the pain that would follow once he hit the floor.

Strong hands grabbed him, one on each arm and two around his waist.

"Hyung!” Four voices cried out in unison and Jaejoong stiffened in shock, eyes snapping open to see Changmin look up worriedly from the floor. His hands were outreached, just below his knee to cushion his impact if he happened to hit the ground.

The hands around his waist moved across his stomach, circling as he was pulled upwards into a warm chest. He looked from side to side where Junsu and Yoochun were standing as they released his arms and knew automatically that Yunho was embracing him.

“The audience…” Jaejoong croaked. He cleared his throat before trying again, composing his voice to be calm. “The audience is calling you.”

“Hyung, the audience is calling us.” Yoochun corrected.

Jaejoong blinked and felt Yunho’s chin rest on his shoulder, his arms tightened a bit in reassurance before loosening slightly.

“Us?” Jaejoong repeated. The four members exchanged exasperated looks.

“Yes, Hyung.” Junsu said, cheerfully.

“Do you need your crutches?” Changmin asked, looking around for them.

“Crutches?” Jaejoong repeated in confusion. “Oh no, I don’t need them.”

“Are you sure?” Yunho’s quiet voice next to his ear startled him and he knew the taller man had felt him jump. “It’s okay.”

Jaejoong knew he wasn’t referring to his crutches but rather his internal struggle.

That dancer is only temporary. We can’t exist without you.

Everyone’s eyes were on him, recognizing him and his flaws.

You’re not a burden.

Accidents can happen.

No one is perfect.

Learn to lean on us a little.

Smiling brightly, Jaejoong let out a joyful laugh that made everyone backstage turn to look at them.

“Let’s go before they scream themselves into a heart attack.” Jaejoong joked. Yunho loosened his arms slowly and stepped back, grabbing his hand. Their fingers entwined unhurriedly as they moved back onto the stage.

Dong Bang!

“Sorry to keep you waiting!” Yoochun called out while grinning into his microphone. “We had a small incident backstage.”

“What kind of incident?” Junsu asked, in mock confusion as he turned to Micky.

“Oh, our leader had a problem keeping his hands to himself.” Yoochun sighed.

“Hey! I thought that was my job.” Junsu complained.

The audience erupted in approving screams.

“Please don’t take them seriously.” Changmin commented. Yoochun and Junsu glanced over at him in amusement.

“Yunho-sshi, why are you holding hands with Jaejoong-sshi?” Yoochun remarked as if finally noticing the two of them.

Like the ying yang whose light and darkness can not exist without the other…

…Dong Bang Shin Ki can not exist without Youngwoong Jaejoong.

“Why?” Yunho met his gaze with warm eyes. “It’s because I want to.”

Drabble

Tue, 23 Oct 2007 04:44:13 GMT

Drabble!
Untitled!
Totally G
Theme: Autumn
Warning: Character Death...JaeHo!

His hand pushed against the smooth wood of the door, brushing lightly against the metal panel that is connected to the handle on the other side. Blinking as the afternoon sun stung his eyes, he stepped out of the library and into the autumn chill. With a slight shiver as his body adjusted to the change of temperature, he pulled his scarf tighter around his neck, his fingers clutching the burgundy soft material that had been hand-knit for him.

A soft smile crossed his lips as he stepped down the stairs from the doors and proceeded across campus. As he walked, the wind blew, promising of the coming winter as the leaves shook on the trees and fell, dancing to the ground.

YunHo watched absently as beautiful shades of orange, red, yellow, and brown crunched under his feet. Its pieces adding to the decaying matter underneath the brilliantly colored leaves.

It seemed not too long ago when YunHo was walking down the same path with him. His eyes had shone in happiness as he watched the leaves drift along the ground before being picked up by the breeze. They waltzed through the air, unhindered by any obstacle until they finished their dance.

“Hyung.” A hand landed on his shoulder and he turned his head slightly, smiling at YooChun. “The leaves are beautiful, aren’t they?”

“There’s something about autumn that makes me think of love.” YunHo replied, quietly.

YunHo had gone to the library to study again, waiting patiently for him to come. His laugh was quiet, resonating throughout the dusty shelves. Every time he opened a book, he could feel his lips ghosting along the curve of his face.

The library had been his favorite place.

“Yunho-ah…”

He jerked at his name, his hand automatically coming up to his ear.

It had felt so real like the warm breath against his face was not actually the cold autumn breeze whispering softly.

“Hyung, let’s go.” YooChun smiled, softly. Knowingly.

“Aa…” YunHo replied as he followed the younger man.

Everything had its price.

And YunHo's price had been JaeJoong.

The plot bunny bites! [Oneshot] .:UnFamiliar:.

Wed, 10 Oct 2007 02:10:58 GMT

No "Extent" update but a random plot bunny bit me in Korean modern society class yesterday.

Title: UnFamiliar
Author: Kisu
Rating: G
Pairing: YunJae?
Genre: One-shot, angst,
Summary: In Korean society, bridal gifts are delivered by the groom's friends to the house of bride. JaeJoong refuses to do so for YunHo because it would be indirectly giving up his rights to him. YunHo doesn't understand and realizes too late.

“You’ll do this for me, right?” he asked anxiously.

For the first time since he had sat down at the table in the small café, JaeJoong raised his head, just a little so he could see him from under the rim of his favorite baseball cap.

There was a reason why he always wore it out. When he had bought it, he had joked with YooChun that the camouflage pattern would hide him from the fan girls.

“Ask someone else to do it.” JaeJoong replied, quietly. “I don’t want to.”

“JaeJoongie, I really want you to deliver the gift.” YunHo insisted. “I don’t trust anyone else.”

“The others are going too. I just don’t understand why I have to be the one to hand it to them.” JaeJoong said, gritting his teeth.

YunHo reached across the table and placed his hand on top of his folded ones. His thumb ran across the skin on the back of your hand softly and JaeJoong bit his lip, knowing he would soon give in.

“I want you to be my best man.” YunHo explained, gently. “I want you next to me at my wedding.”

JaeJoong slid his chair back and stood up suddenly, making a loud clattering noise throughout the quiet café. The other customers turned at the sound, eyes wide and mouths open, watching with interest.

Without saying a word, he turned and stormed out of the café, not caring whether or not he was making a public spectacle of himself.

“JaeJoong!” YunHo yelled, before quickly shutting his mouth as the curious looks of the customers became ones of recognition. He threw some money onto the table to cover the bill before rushing out of the café.

Seeing the familiar back in the distance, he ran, jostling people and muttering apologies as he raced to catch up to him.

This strange feeling of panic was familiar.

Grabbing hold of JaeJoong’s arm, he spun the older man around, catching a glimpse of his surprise expression as well as eyes that seemed a little too wet. Confused and panicked, he dragged JaeJoong into the nearest alley.

“What’s wrong?” he asked, drawing the stiff figure into his arms. “What did I do? Why are you treating me this way?”

“You’re leaving me.” JaeJoong said, shoving him away. “You’re getting married and leaving me!”

“That’s not true.” YunHo protested. “We can still get together with the rest of the members…”

“We’re not Dong Bang Shin Ki anymore, YunHo!” JaeJoong yelled in frustration. “Once you get married, there will be no us anymore. Don’t you understand?”

“No, I don’t…” YunHo frowned.

JaeJoong closed his eyes and breathed in deep before exhaling harshly.

“I will deliver the bridal gift for you, but after you’re married, I won’t contact you again.” JaeJoong said, calmly. “Don’t think about calling me.”

“Joongie, be reasonable!” YunHo exclaimed in exasperation. “Are you jealous? Is that it? Why can’t you accept that I want to get married and start a family?”

JaeJoong’s expression darkened before immediately wiping away into a blank mask.

“You’re right. I’m not reasonable.” JaeJoong said, softly. “I hate seeing you happy. It makes me sick.”

YunHo’s feet carried him backwards until his back brushed up against the opposite wall. The brick was cold against his shirt, its chill bled through the cotton and into his skin, so that it snaked icily down to the base of his spine.

“Why?” he asked.

“If you don’t understand now, you won’t ever understand.” JaeJoong replied. “Do you still want me to be your best man?”

YunHo caught JaeJoong’s gaze and held it for what seemed like eternity.

“Yes,” he decided, firmly. Disappointment flickered across JaeJoong’s face and he quickly lowered his head so his face was covered by the rim of his hat.

“Okay.” JaeJoong whispered. He walked forward and caught a hold of YunHo’s hand. Their fingers immediately linked together and YunHo looked down at the familiar sight.

Slowly, JaeJoong released his grip and YunHo felt the urge to tighten his own.

But he didn’t.

The loss of warmth in his hand was an uncomfortable feeling.

All his instincts told him to stop JaeJoong from walking away.

But he didn’t.

“Thank you.” JaeJoong smiled, warmly.

It was a smile that reached his eyes, reserved to only those who he loved.

“For what?” YunHo asked, but his voice came out strained and he didn’t know why.

“For everything....” JaeJoong told him as he stepped out from the alley and into the brightly sunlit street.

“Joongie, I-.” YunHo began.

“I’ll deliver the gift tomorrow morning. They will receive it, I promise.” JaeJoong interrupted, smoothly.

YunHo’s cell phone rang.

JaeJoong waited, patiently.

Not breaking eye contact, YunHo reached down into his jeans to draw out his phone.

He quickly glanced down to the screen and looked back up.

“Ah—it’s her parents…” he began, only to stop in mid-sentence.

JaeJoong was gone.

And YunHo was left with a tight feeling in his chest.

This feeling….

He closed his eyes.

His cell phone rang.

...was an unfamiliar feeling.

[Fic] .:Extent:.oo3

Mon, 08 Oct 2007 00:07:00 GMT

Extent
Chapter 3

[Their bedroom]

It was one of those mornings that JaeJoong woke up knowing it was going to be a good day. Somehow, he just knew it when his subconscious filled with uneasiness and he knew someone was hovering over him in his sleep.

His eyes snapped opened and he stared blankly at the person’s face above him before turning and pulling his blankets up over his head.

YunHo scowled in disappointment, wanting at least some sort of reaction. Manager-hyung had always been given the privilege of JaeJoong’s startled yells in the mornings as he hovered above this oldest member to wake him up while the others were sitting around the breakfast table.

Usually it wasn’t long after when they would hear YooChun’s exclamations of surprise.

“Yah, why aren’t you yelling?” YunHo asked, prodding the bundle with his hand.

“Your face is too pretty to yell at.” JaeJoong’s reply was muffled. YunHo laughed and prodded the bundle again.

“YooChun is awake already. We have an early photo shoot today.” YunHo told him.

“Mmm…” JaeJoong mumbled.

“You’re not falling asleep are you?” YunHo asked, suspiciously.

“No.” JaeJoong said from underneath the blankets.

He heard the bathroom door open and soon YooChun entered the room, freshly showered and dressed in a pair of faded jeans along with a light pink shirt and JaeJoong’s favorite black zip up sweater. Without sparing a glance at YunHo, he got into JaeJoong’s bed and snuggled underneath the blankets.

YunHo could only watch open-mouth as the bundle thrashed and JaeJoong emerged, eyes wide.

“YooChun! What did you do?” YunHo gasped in horror.

What did YooChun do to him underneath the blankets?

Did he touch…?

Oh my god he did!

“Why are your feet so cold?!” JaeJoong yelled pushing at YooChun’s unresponsive figure.

“That’s why I need you to warm me up, Hyung.” YooChun replied, winking at him. JaeJoong rolled his eyes.

“What is this? Pick on Kim JaeJoong day?” JaeJoong demanded as he made his way out of his blankets and stood up, stepping onto YooChun’s butt in the process of getting off his bed and ignoring his ‘Oof!’. “I have to remind you, I am the oldest! You should respect me!”

“Yes, Hyung.” YunHo and YooChun said, obediently.

“There better be some hot water left!” JaeJoong grumbled as he left the room. “What time is it? Why didn’t you wake me up earlier?”

The door to the bathroom finally closed and ChangMin poked his head into the bedroom curiously.

“Hm? What made Jae-Hyung all riled up?” ChangMin asked. YunHo and YooChun exchanged mischievous looks and turned back to ChangMin, shrugging. The youngest member frowned and eyed them suspiciously.

After a long tense moment ChangMin finally left and the two found they could breathe again.

[In the kitchen]

Manager-hyung came into their apartment just as JaeJoong finished getting ready. The eldest had thrown on a black sleeveless shirt with jeans that looked suspiciously like YooChun’s.

The other four gave him envious looks and wondered for the umpteenth time how he managed to look so good in such a short time.

“What?” JaeJoong asked when he noticed the four was staring at him.

“Hyung, have some fruit or cereal before we leave.” ChangMin said as he got up to go search for the sought items.

“It’s okay. I’ll grab something to eat later.” JaeJoong replied as he bowed his head in greeting to their manager. “We shouldn’t keep people waiting.”

“We have enough time, JaeJoong.” Their manager said. “Why don’t you bring it with us?”

ChangMin threw JaeJoong an apple and he caught it on reflex, showing the fruit to all of them before taking a bite out of it. He left the room to reappear in a gray and white striped sweater that he had randomly grabbed.

Again, they could only stare in envy on why everything looked good on him.

“What?” JaeJoong asked again as he took another bite of his apple.

“How do you do it?” JunSu finally asked in irritation. JaeJoong could only stare at him in puzzlement before ripping another chunk out of his apple.

[To the set]

Everyone was in high spirits during the ride to the location of the photo shoot. It was extremely noisy as JunSu cracked jokes while YooChun threatened to kill him.

ChangMin and JaeJoong bickered over random things and YunHo sat back listening to his mp3 player. Once in awhile he would voice his opinion as he caught snippets of the conversations through the breaks in his music.

Their manager tuned them all out by as he happily whistled “Balloons” to himself.

They were still in their high mode as they entered the set. JaeJoong and ChangMin were still bickering if coconuts were actually nuts.

“It’s not a nut!” JaeJoong protested, his voice rising dramatically. “It’s hollow and--.”

He turned around, stopping in his tracks and his sentence dropped, forgotten. ChangMin frowned, glanced over JaeJoong’s shoulder and grasped his arm gently.

“Hyung, what’s wrong?” he asked, worriedly. The muscles were tense underneath his fingers and he rubbed them soothingly.

YooChun broke off his death threat to JunSu in mid-sentence and turned around when he realized that JaeJoong had stopped talking. He walked back to them and wrapped his arm around his shoulders.

“What’s wrong?” YooChun watched as JaeJoong could only raise his arm and point in the direction he was staring at. YooChun followed the line from his finger and inhaled sharply.

YooChun’s grip on JaeJoong’s left shoulder tightened.

“Hyung, are you not feeling well?” JunSu asked walking back toward them. “Do you need to go to the bathroom?”

“I’m okay.” JaeJoong replied with some effort. “I’m just nervous.”

“Hyung~! After this, we have the day free right?” ChangMin brought up, suddenly. He smiled brightly and JaeJoong turned to him, distractedly.

“Yes…?” JaeJoong blinked.

“Ah! Let’s go to the market and buy some things for dinner!” ChangMin exclaimed in delight.

“Stupid! People will recognize us!” YooChun frowned.

ChangMin shot him a look that could kill. “We’ll be in disguises.”

“Fine, I’m coming too. I want to go to Starbucks.” YooChun said, sticking his tongue out.

“After your announcement of your love for Starbucks, I’m sure fans are camped out at every single one!” JunSu admonished.

“Hey, at least I have more fans than you do!” YooChun mocked while mimicking JunSu’s “cute” face.

“What’s the hold up?” YunHo asked, walking toward them with their manager.

“Jae-Hyung isn’t feeling well.” JunSu spoke up, immediately destroying their artificial creation of comfort.

“Joongie? Do you want to sit down?” YunHo asked with worry. JaeJoong shook his head and JunSu grabbed YunHo’s arm, bringing him away from the group.

“How deep do you think that pool is?” he asked softly.

YunHo tensed and stared at JunSu in shock before glancing toward the set and realizing what their set actually was. Past glass double doors, the sun beat down happily onto a pool of water.

“It’s a little higher than the waist.” Their manager’s voice startled them both and they turned to see him standing behind them. “Why? Someone doesn’t know how to swim?”

“JaeJoongie…” YunHo began.

“Of course I can swim.” JaeJoong interjected in defense. “We can’t keep them waiting. Noona! Do my makeup first!”

YunHo could only look on worriedly as JaeJoong strode away with the female makeup artist.

I’m fine.

JaeJoong repeated to himself mentally as he watched the feet of the woman walking in front of him. He swallowed thickly and willed himself to calm the tide of emotions that threatened to destroy his composure.

I didn’t dream last night.

It will all be okay.

I won’t die.

Please…don’t let me die.

[FIC] .:Extent:.oo2

Wed, 12 Sep 2007 07:38:27 GMT

I promised a double release but that's not going to happen. But I'll try to get another one out later this week. Not definite though...

This chapter is unbeta-ed...anyone willing to be a regular beta for meeee~?

More JaeHo in the chap. but everyone needs a little loving...^^

.:oo2:.

[ 1:30 pm – Bathroom in the Apartment]

Sometimes he wondered what kind of life he would have lived if he hadn’t auditioned for SM Entertainment and became an official trainee. Although training was hard on all newcomers, he had relished in the soreness of his muscles after dance practice and the rawness of his throat from practicing his vocals for 5 hours straight every day.

He would smile quietly when one of the staff members or other trainees complimented his singing. Not one to boast his talents, he knew that everything was achieved through hard work and the ability to sing was the fruit of his success.

On the days he felt like giving up, YunHo would place a warm hand on his shoulder. Telling him earnestly, “JaeJoong-ah, no one can sing like you do.”

When it was announced that he would be placed in an acapella group that was later named Dong Bang Shin Ki, he was ecstatic. At night, he dared not to shut his eyes as he worried endlessly he wouldn’t wake up one morning to realize everything had only been a dream.

Nowadays, when he had a moment of peace to reflect his accomplishments, he did a lot of thinking. Perhaps he would have been a small restaurant owner, living off the stories of the customers who walked in hungry and walked out happily satiated.

With a growl, he attacked the tub with a brush.

Today was a free day from their hectic schedule and the other four had encouraged him to stay behind and relax. The others had ran out to grab groceries and restock on miscellaneous supplies needed around the house.

A small smile crossed his lips as he thought of the members before returning to a scowl.

He’ll like them even more if they weren’t so damn messy.

In the middle of scrubbing, he heard the sound of the front door opening, the rustle of bags, and footsteps everywhere in the once quiet apartment.

“JaeJoongie!” YunHo called out.

“We’re back!” JunSu sang, happily.

“Hyung! Where are you?” YooChun yelled. “Come out here!”

“Hyung!” ChangMin’s footsteps pounded down the hall, and doors opened and closed repeatedly.

There was a pause as the youngest member walked through a mental image of the house and his footsteps approached fast. JaeJoong barely had the time to conceal his laughter before the bathroom door swung open.

“Hyung! I told you to wait until I got back so I can help you with the cleaning!” ChangMin gasped.

JaeJoong stared in amusement at ChangMin’s horrified expression.

“I got bored,” he replied simply, as he turned back to his task.

“Hyung~!” ChangMin whined as he knelt down beside him. “Hyung, we brought home ingredients to make Pat Bing Su! But you have to watch us, we might hurt ourselves!”

“Shaving ice?” JaeJoong stated pointedly.

“Hyung~!” ChangMin pouted. “I’ll finish the cleaning later! Besides, this tub is already sparkling clean!”

JaeJoong looked down and noticed he was right. With a sigh, he got up and pushed ChangMin away, gave the tub a final rinse and stripped his hands of its pink latex gloves.

ChangMin gave a little whoop of glee and proceeded to take JaeJoong’s arm, dragging him urgently into the kitchen.

A model. JaeJoong decided. With his looks he would have been scouted as a model and debuted with a few commercials. His thoughtful gaze landed on Changmin’s hand on his elbow before traveling up the length of Changmin’s arm to his head and down his back.

“Min-ah, when are you going to stop growing?” JaeJoong sighed in exasperation. ChangMin looked over his shoulder and grinned happily at him in response.

YooChun, JunSu, and YunHo looked up as they walked in and JaeJoong stopped to put his gloves next to the kitchen sink.

“Hyung! Hyung!” YooChun cheered as he proudly displayed the ice particles he was shaving up. “We bought a lot of stuff!”

“Let’s cut the fruit up.” YunHo suggested as he began taking various items out of the bags on the kitchen table.

“We have to wash them first.” ChangMin frowned as he walked over.

“Hurry! Hurry!” JunSu exclaimed. “The ice is going to melt!”

“Yah! You do your share of the work too!” YooChun shot back.

“I’ll open the can!” JunSu said as he grabbed the condensed milk and walked over to find the can opener.

“Can I help?” JaeJoong asked, eyeing JunSu as he rummaged the drawers wildly for the can opener. With a laugh, he opened the right drawer and handed JunSu the besought item. “I’ll get the bowls and spoons.”

“Make JunSu do it.” YooChun grumbled as he continued with his task.

“I’m busy!” JunSu protested as he struggled with the can opener.

“JunSu, do you need help?” JaeJoong asked as he set the bowls and spoons on top of the counter.

“Well since you offered…” JunSu beamed.

“Kim JunSu, you lazy good for nothing!” YooChun yelled from across the room.

You have to admit. Jaejoong smiled to himself. You can’t help but love the guys.

“Hyung, what are you thinking about?” JunSu asked, curiously. The other three looked in their direction as well and JaeJoong just shook his head.

“Nothing important,” he replied.

“A girl!” YooChun cried in shock, deciding for himself. “You’re thinking about a girl, aren’t you? Hyung, what about me?”

“A girl?” YunHo asked, sharply. JaeJoong gave him an amused glance.

“No, I’m not thinking about a girl.” JaeJoong replied evenly, as he placed the can opener on the counter and pried the lid up gingerly from the creamy confection it was drowning in.

“Who is she, Hyung?” JunSu asked. “She can’t be as pretty as you.”

“JaeJoong is very pretty.” YunHo agreed, automatically.

“You guys are ridiculous.” Changmin frowned as he brought the clamshell of strawberries over to the sink. “Listening to you guys is making me stupid.”

“Min! You are mean!” JunSu pouted. JaeJoong laughed quietly as he wiggled the lid back in forth from, willing the lid to snap off cleanly.

“Can’t be as stupid as JunSu, all he thinks about is soccer.” YooChun added in from the table.

“YooChun, you--.” JunSu began.

“Ouch.”

All noise ceased and JunSu automatically glanced down at JaeJoong, seeing the blood welling up into a cut on his finger.

“Blood! Hyung, are you all right?” JunSu panicked as he grabbed JaeJoong’s wrist.

“I’m fine. But I think I need a bandage.” JaeJoong replied, bringing his hand back to himself.

“You should have just let me do it, Hyung!” JunSu cried. “I’ll get you a bandage!” He ran off quickly in the direction of the bathroom.

JaeJoong made to move over to the sink where ChangMin was watching him in concern when a hand grabbed his elbow. Glancing back, he stared at YunHo in confusion. The taller man grabbed his wrist and placed his finger into his mouth.

His eyes widened as he felt the warm muscle of YunHo’s tongue slide over his finger, cleaning the cut gently.

ChangMin and YooChun stood still, eyes glued to the scene, and brains unable to respond from shock.

JaeJoong’s gaze softened. Leader-shii was sometimes surprising, but JaeJoong was used to his surprises by now.

As if reading his thoughts, YunHo met his eyes and slowly opened his mouth, allowing JaeJoong to withdraw his finger.

“I’m thinking, how grateful I am to have met all of you.” JaeJoong said, quietly. “How I am blessed to have lived with all of you, cooked for all of you, and shared meals at the same table.”

“You don’t know how long you’ll last in this world. One night you may go to sleep and you might never wake up. Then what would happen?” JaeJoong continued. “Where would your consciousness go? Will it be asleep forever? Or will it head up high where such a thing as God resides?”

“Hyung…” YooChun whispered.

“I’ve been wondering these things lately but I haven’t come up with an answer.” JaeJoong frowned as ChangMin slowly washed the rest of the strawberries. “What should I do?”

Arms wrapped around his waist and he was pulled back into a familiar embrace.

“Please, stop talking JaeJoong-ah.” YunHo said, softly. YunHo’s arms tightened stressing his discomfort.

“Truthfully…” JaeJoong said, as he placed his hands on top of YunHo’s arms. “I’ve been dreaming about my death.”

“Hyung!” JunSu walked back in with the box of bandages, eyes wide as he caught the last part of JaeJoong’s sentence.

“I think I might die soon.” JaeJoong said, closing his eyes. “It’s unbearable.”

“That’s impossible, dreams are just dreams.” YooChun replied hesitantly.

“I’ve always thought I would be fine with death but now I’m really scared.” JaeJoong whispered, swallowing with some difficulty. “I really don’t want to die.”

“If this is about the situation last week on the stage…” YunHo started.

“No. It’s not just about last week.” JaeJoong interrupted. “I have a dream the same dream every night. In the dream, I’m drowning.”

“Hyung, it’s just a coincidence.” ChangMin argued. “Maybe last week’s incident unsettled your nerves.”

“I feel it coming.” JaeJoong insisted. “It’s there, not that far away in the future.”

“What? There’s no way you can die!” JunSu exclaimed, voice squeaking nervously. “You’re healthy and not sick at all!”

“We won’t let you die.” YunHo said, hoarsely as he buried his face into his shoulder. “I won’t let you die. So there’s no way Death can take you away from us.”

“Then please,” JaeJoong’s hands on top of YunHo’s arms tightened slightly. “Please hold on to me tight with all your strength and don’t let go.”

The apartment fell into an uneasy silence as everyone was consumed with their own thoughts.

JunSu was the first to break it, finding the unusual tension unbearable.

“Ah! The ice is melting!” he gasped in horror.

YooChun stared at him in confusion before glancing down at his bowl of ice that was rapidly turning into slush.

“Shit!”

“Cut up the fruit quickly!” JunSu yelped. Changmin quickly shook the excess water off the colander that was holding the strawberries and walked over to the table.

During this chaos, YunHo and JaeJoong were the only ones left immobile. Slowly, YunHo unwound his arms, bringing his hands down over JaeJoong’s. Their fingers interlaced the others, curling lovingly as they spoke a silent language of comfort before YunHo stepped away and JaeJoong released his hands.

“We don’t have to wash the blueberries, right?” YunHo spoke up as he stepped back over to the table and picked up a container of the said fruits.

“Of course we do!” ChangMin replied, automatically.

“I want bananas.” JaeJoong said, calmly as he neatly wrapped a bandage around his finger. “Cut up some for me.”

“Bananas?” YunHo repeated, blankly. “Oh! So that’s what we forgot to buy.”

“But we bought mangoes! They taste better then bananas, Hyung!” JunSu chirped.

“But…mangoes will taste weird with cereal.” JaeJoong complained.

“They will taste weird.” ChangMin agreed.

“We’ll get Manager-Hyung to bring us some tomorrow morning.” “JunHo reassured them.

“I like bananas with my cereal too.” YooChun said. The four of them stared at him for his late response before bursting out in laughter.

JaeJoong smiled.

For the mean time, he was positive that he would get a dreamless sleep tonight.

[ 2:45 pm - end chapter 2]

[Fic] .:Extent:.oo1

Sat, 25 Aug 2007 02:50:08 GMT

Title: Extent
Author: Kisu
Rating: PG
Length: 1/??
Genre: Mystery, Angst
Paring: Jaejoong x Yunho
Summary: Nightmares aren't real but if they reoccur nightly, along with the strange incidents of possible serious accidents, would make any sane person crazy. Jaejoong keeps dreaming of his death and time is running out. What would be the extent of his dreams?

.:oo1:.

His mouth opened and closed soundlessly, his body arching off the bed as his arms flailed, hands straining to grasp a hold of anything.

He was drowning. His lungs ached from the lack of oxygen and his throat worked convulsively as he tried to rouse himself into consciousness and away from this sleep-induced death.

Drowning; what a horrible way to die.

His chest heaved as he inhaled sharply, eyes snapping open to meet the ceiling of the bedroom. For a few minutes he laid still, listening to the blood rushing in his ears as he fought to calm his pulse down.

Forcing himself to take a few steadying breaths, he patiently willed the raging storm in his body to relax. Gradually, the pounding of his pulse quieted and was replaced by the light snores of the other occupants in the room.

Reaching backwards, he slipped his hand underneath his pillow and withdrew his cell phone. A soft green glow lit up his face and he blinked, adjusting his eyes to the sudden brightness to read the time.

2:00 am.

It hadn’t been long since he had fallen asleep.

“Hyung?” The soft voice on his left made him start in surprise and he turned to the speaker.

“It’s nothing. Go back to sleep.” Jaejoong whispered. He heard Changmin roll over and shift into a more comfortable position underneath his blankets. Then he placed his cell phone back underneath his pillow and drew his arms underneath his head.

This was getting ridiculous.

[7:30 am: breakfast in the kitchen]

“Good morning.” Changmin yawned as he sat down at the breakfast table. He rubbed his eyes, glad to have gotten to the bathroom before Yunho or Junsu did. Yoochun on the other hand, was a different story, and had yet to rouse from his deep slumber.

“Good morning.” Jaejoong echoed as he placed a plate a huge plate heaping with eggs, sausage, and bacon onto the middle of the table along with a smaller plate of toast.

Changmin noted absently that they were having a simple Western-styled breakfast this morning, something that Jaejoong made because it was quick and easy when they didn’t feel like eating cold cereal.

He reached for a piece of toast and spooned a huge portion of eggs onto his own plate as he watched Jaejoong pour cereal into a bowl.

“I’ll get it.” Changmin voiced out when he noticed that Jaejoong was searching absently for something on the table top. He got up and walked over to the fridge to withdraw a carton of milk before walking back over to the table and pouring its contents into Jaejoong’s bowl.

“Thanks.” Jaejoong said, smiling as his thoughtfulness. Changmin returned a warm smile of his own before placing the carton back into the fridge.

Another thing to note was that Jaejoong would eat cereal when he was tired in the morning, not wanting to go through of the hassle of chewing through inconsistent textures and flavors.

“Hyung, did you get any sleep last night?” Changmin asked, softly.

Jaejoong looked up distractedly from his bowl of cereal. “I got enough.”

“You were moving around a lot. Did you have a bad dream?” Changmin continued as he pierced a sausage link with his fork.

“Something like that…” Jaejoong replied between mouthfuls of cereal.

“What did you dream about?” Changmin asked, curiously. Jaejoong looked up, his eyes meeting his.

“Death.”

The fork in Changmin’s hand clanked noisily against his plate as it fell from his slackened grip.

“W-What?” Changmin swallowed, his eyes incredibly wide as his Hyung gazed at him expressionless.

The tension in the air broke when Jaejoong let out a burst of laughter.

“I’m just kidding.” Jaejoong snickered as he slid his chair back and got up. “Hurry and finish. We have to leave soon.”

“You’re so mean, Hyung!” Changmin pouted as he picked up his work. “For a minute, I thought you were serious.” He looked up and noticed that Jaejoong’s back went rigid.

“Hyung?”

[11:32 am – lunch time in studio dressing room]

It had begun lately, signs of his own death haunting him in his sleeping hours. However, his waking hours were even more stressful as close encounters to would-be serious accidents were occurring too often.

His most recent episode was the sensor of the elevator doors failing and almost incapacitating his hand. Even if it was paranoia, he had read somewhere it had happened to someone’s head.

Yet, he remain quiet, worried that if he told the others they would be too concerned to focus on their schedule.

“Where’s Jaejoong?” Yunho asked as he stepped in the dressing room. “It’s time to eat.”

Changmin was already attacking their provided lunches with a vigorous appetite and Junsu who was sitting next to him, motioned over to the couch.

Yoochun was sleeping, his hood drawn over his head and Jaejoong was lying on the rest of the couch with his head on Yoochun’s lap.

Yunho frowned in disapproval. “It’s okay if you guys sleep here but not in that position. It might offend the staff. Jaejoong should know better.” He strolled over, intent to wake up their lead vocalist and ignoring Junsu’s protests behind him.

As he reached down to grab Jaejoong’s shoulder, another hand grasped his, halting his movement.

“Let him be.” Yoochun said, leaning his head back on the couch so he could meet his eyes from underneath his hood. “This is the first time Hyung has fallen asleep on our schedule.”

Yunho retracted his hand and straightened, realizing Yoochun’s words were right. Normally when the group didn’t get enough sleep, Jaejoong and he would volunteer to go first on their photoshoots. This was as well for makeup for performances and interviews, allowing the younger three to catch up on sleep by taking short naps.

“You two should eat.” Yunho sighed. “We have rehearsal in a few hours.”

“Let him sleep for a few more minutes, Hyung.” Yoochun murmured, before closing his eyes and settling himself back into his nap.

“Jae Hyung has been more tired than usual.” Junsu commented as Yunho turned around and walked back to the table. “Maybe it’s stress?”

Changmin choked on his food.

[3:52 pm – rehearsal on stage]

Yunho glanced at Jaejoong for the umpteenth time that afternoon, brows furrowed in concern toward the older boy. Jaejoong had stirred 15 minutes after Yunho had tried to wake him and apologized for falling asleep. Then he proceeded to rouse Yoochun and the two sleepily stumbled over to the stable to finish what was left of lunch that Changmin had not devoured.

Jaejoong still acted the same, talking loudly and picking small fights with Changmin and Yoochun. However, everything seemed off – from the way that the group found him more distracted than normal and how he absently fell deep into thought.

This was one of the times, Yunho had realized as Jaejoong performed his dance steps flawlessly and sang his parts of their song. But his eyes were unfocused and his was expression eerily blank.

Like a robot. He thought with a frown.

Yoochun shot him a questioning glance as he passed him, shifting to the front of the group. Yunho could only give him a weak smile as Yoochun passed him and immediately cued in on his rap.

Yunho absently let his eyes wander, noting how one of the lights directly above Jaejoong was unfocused. He made a mental note to get one of the stage techs to correct it once the song was over.

Just as he finished the thought, the light tilted strangely and he inhaled sharply, realizing that it had came loose.

Yoochun turned to look at him, wondering why Yunho had forgotten his cue. His eyes traveled to where Yunho was staring in fear.

“Jaejoong!” Yunho yelled out over the music, feeling his heart plummet as Jaejoong looked in his direction in confusion. He shifted his feet, moving into his steps naturally and to his horror, in the direct path of the falling light.

By now the distraction had caused Changmin and Junsu to stop in their movements. Yunho dashed forward, barreling into Jaejoong and sent them, crashing onto the stage floor.

A moment later, the stage light fell with a heavy thud, crashing into the stage with such ferocity, the group was shaken at the thought if Yunho was a second too late.

“Hyung-duel!” Changmin, Junsu, and Yoochun raced forward in alarm.

Immediately the music was cut and their manager came running onto the stage.

“Are you all right? Is anyone hurt?” Their manager exclaimed in panic.

“We’re all right.” Yunho assured him, calmly. “Jaejoong-ah, are you hurt?” He shifted his body so that his weight wasn’t crushing the smaller man.

“I’m fine.” Jaejoong said, shakily. Yoochun fell on his knees, wrapping his arms around Jaejoong’s shoulders. “Yoochun, I’m fine.”

He patted Yoochun’s arms reassuringly and frowned when he realized his hand was shaking. Yoochun immediately grabbed a hold of it and squeezed it tightly.

Changmin offered a hand to Yunho who accepted it and got up easily. He watched as Junsu knelt down next to the two men, rubbing Yoochun’s back as Yoochun buried his face in Jaejoong’s back.

“Get someone to fix this.” Yunho told his manager, his eyes narrowing in fury. “Now.”

[4:00 pm – end]